Today I am thankful for reminders the pains of learning you’ve been wrong. How’s that for a mouthful?
Sometimes I get very frustrated when I’m told that I’ve been doing something wrong. What do you mean I’m doing it wrong? YOU are the one who’s wrong, not this guy. What do you think I am, a red headed step child? Umm…
You get may drift, I don’t like being told I’ve been doing it wrong. If I’ve been doing it wrong it means a coupe of things that are frustrating.
First, I was wrong in the first place. Man do i hate that. I know it happens a lot, but it drives me crazy.
Second, it means I’ve been doing it wrong for a while. Repeated failure without anyone either noticing me or caring for me enough to mention it. That’s a pretty hurtful feeling, knowing that someone has been noticing that I’ve been wrong but haven’t told me. The only feeling worse is when I never find out. There’s that constant nagging of wondering if there’s something wrong, will someone tell me.
Third, it means I have to swallow my pride. One of my team members has had a few just butt kicking years and instead of seeking out his input over the years I’ve continued to resist and explain why he was wrong any time he shared ideas and advice with me. Only recently did I take a deep breath, give him a call, and asked him for help. I know that in the long run it will help both my team and I get better. I am very thankful that he’s still willing to help me out.
So why am I bringing this up today? I had a great 3rd person view of this process live at Gavin’s archery class today.
Today was his second archery class and his instructor figured out that while Gavin is right handed he is left eye dominant. As his instructor was telling him that he became upset. “I’m doing it wrong?” he asked, a sound of panic in his voice. “I’m right handed, I’m not left handed,” was his next argument as he argued a fact that no one was disagreeing with. When the instructor said that he was going to get him a new “little lefty bow” Gavin almost cried, “I don’t need a little lefty bow.” Here was help being presented to him to help him get better and he wasn’t having any of it. He wanted to do what he thought was right and without coaching. He didn’t like being told he was doing it wrong. He didn’t want to swallow his pride.
But you know what? He did it. He did it like a champ. First three arrows were lined up better than he had shot the whole class. Next thing I knew he was smiling about it and had moved on.
And that’s what got me thinking. There’s little “Mini Me” going through the same stages I go through, and in a lot less time. Maybe I should be learning more from that little dude. Maybe I’m wrong, but I’m okay with that.